Shameless Advertising
by K-chan9
Summary: After two years of dormancy the advertising campaign adventure draws to a close for our GOA students. But is it really the end? Chapter 11 UP!
1. Kizna and Vanilla Coke

Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me and neither do the products they advertise! If I owned MK there'd be a whole second season and a movie already, geez!  
  
Hello again~! K-chan is back from a much needed vacation! I'll update my other fic Adventures at GOA someday in the very near future. Chapter 5 and 6 will be the final two chapters and then that's it for that fic! It just didn't get enough reviews. Anywho, there's a new fic in town! Shameless advertisements! That's right your favorite MK characters advertising some of your favorite products! And maybe some you've never heard of. First up is Kizna advertising. Vanilla Coke?! Of course. Heeheehee!  
  
*lights come up on Kizna walking down a random GOA hallway*  
  
Mysterious voice: Psst! Psst! Kizna don't look over here! *Kizna's ears perk up*  
  
Kizna: Huh?  
  
Mysterious voice: DON'T LOOK! *Kizna immediately looks in the direction of a voice and there is a door with a sign tackily taped on that says, "DO NOT ENTER!" *  
  
Kizna: Hmm? How very suspicious! *Kizna steps towards door and places her hand on the handle*  
  
Door: DON"T OPEN ME!!!  
  
Kizna: Oh please! *Kizna opens door despite its helpless protests*  
  
Door: DON'T ENTER ME!!  
  
Kizna: Yeah right! *Kizna enters room and door quickly slams behind her* *the lights quickly click on in the room revealing Yamagi dressed in all black*  
  
Yamagi: I see you're a very curious young lady  
  
Kizna: *glaring* Yamagi, aren't you a little short for this role?  
  
Yamagi: OH SHUT UP! And lemme say my lines. Hmph. Y'know curiosity killed the cat.  
  
Kizna: *fuming* WHAT WAS THAT?!  
  
Yamagi: Oh calm down! It was just some comeback line the director told me to use. *realizes they are filming* Opps! What I meant to say was, have no fear because we aren't going to punish you for this we're going to reward you.  
  
Kizna: *curious* Sounds good. But how?  
  
Yamagi: *pulls a drink out of a randomly placed refrigerator* With a nice new Vanilla Coke! It's smooth flavor is extremely refreshing on a nice hot summer day. *hands it to Kizna*  
  
Kizna: *nervously takes a sip* Hey! This is good!  
  
Yamagi: Yes, of course it is! GINO! *an extremely large man comes and throws Kizna out the room*  
  
Kizna: Ouch! *she gets up calmly sipping her coke* Mmm, mmm good!  
  
Yamagi: *voice over* Reward your curiosity, with a new Vanilla coke!  
  
That's the end of the first chapter next up Yu advertising for AMC theaters?! A little screwed up I know but it's going to be okay. If you'd like to guest star in the next commercial just say so in a review. And if you have any ideas for a product to be advertised just mention that in a review too! Well, look for the next chapter soon! 


	2. Yu and AMC Theaters

Whoohoo! I got three reviews for one chapter! I feel so special and loved! Anyway Chapter to is here with my loveable YU-CHAN! Heeheehee! The three guest stars will be Houen kokushibyou, Marie and my friend the author zero who didn't get a chance to review. ( But have no fear Duet-Sama you'll guest star next time with the loveable Rio! MWHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA! On with the commercial!  
  
*lights up on three loud teenagers entering a theater*  
  
Loud Teenager 1: Wow, "Attack of the Victim" is supposed to be a great movie right, Marie?  
  
Loud Teenager 2: Of course, Houen kokushibyou! I PAID GOOD MONEY FOR THIS! You all owe me! *the girls sit down* *the lights dim*  
  
Announcer: And now for our AMC previews! And remember silence is golden! And remember turn off all cellphones and pagers!  
  
Loud Teenager 1: YEAH RIGHT! *cell phone rings* Yo Garaes! No, we're just watching the previews. Whaddya mean silence is golden? Screw you! *clicks off phone*  
  
*suddenly someone can be heard tapping a microphone* *the girls look up to see you staring at them from the screen in front of a microphone with signs*  
  
Loud Teenager 3: HAHA! Look at the girly man!!! *laughing pointing at screen*  
  
Yu: *holds up a sign that says, "Silence is golden!"  
  
Loud Teenager 3: Yeah right! Take this! *she begins throwing popcorn at Yu*  
  
Yu: *glaring* *sign reads, "Stop throwing popcorn at the screen and READ THE PIECES OF PAPER!*  
  
Loud Teenager 2: *pales* Uh zero, how'd he know you did that.  
  
Loud Teenager 3: I don't know!!  
  
Yu: *his sign reads, "YOU THREE GIRLS IN THE BACK QUIT TALKING!!!"*  
  
Loud Teenagers: *screaming like little kindergarteners* EEEEK!!!!  
  
Yu: *his glare becomes more evil* *he holds up a sign next to the microphone that reads, "Be Silent or suffer the consequences."*  
  
Loud Teenager 3: *nervous* Ehehehe! What's he going to do about it! He's just a guy on a giant movie screen!!!! *chuckles nervously*  
  
*the door to the movie theater slams open*  
  
Loud Teenagers: AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!  
  
Yu: I. said be silent or suffer the consequences. *Yu storms over to the teenagers who are cowering in fear*  
  
Loud Teenager 3: Please don't hurt me.  
  
Yu: *he holds up a sign the reads, "SILENCE!"* *the girls all shut up except for Teenager 3 who is whimpering*  
  
Yu: You'll suffer the consequences. *Yu drags a wailing teenager out the theater*  
  
Loud Teenager 3: NOOO! MARIE! HOUEN! DON'T LET HIM GET ME!! AAAH! I'll BE QUIET I PROMISE!!!  
  
Loud Teenager 2 &3: *staring* Oh my..  
  
Loud Teenager 3: *a voice* DEAR GOD NOT THE TAZEEEER! SWEET DANCING BUDDHA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *electric shocking sound is heard*  
  
Yu: *walks up to camera* *he holds up a sign which reads, "And remember kiddies. Silence is golden. Please turn off all cellphones and pagers and please no bootleg tapes."* *light's fade out and evil laughter is heard*  
  
Loud Teenager 1: No Garaes! You don't understand! I never want to use my cellphone ever again!!! Oh my goodness! The horror! The horror! What will happen to our guest stars next???? Who knows! But next up Rio's advertising cereal?! Problems will ensue while Duet-sama guest stars! Please review to be written in or if you have an idea!!! Ciao for now! 


	3. Rio and 7UP

Wow! 10 reviews for 2 chapters I feel so loved! ^_^ I feel special! By the way I'm still doing write ins and taken suggestions and all the suggestions have been great so far! I plan to use all of them. And Marie your welcome! I wuv doing write ins! And now by popular request here's Rio advertising. 7UP?! I know I said cereal but 7UP gave me a talented idea. I mean it's still food right?  
  
*lights up on Rio in a parking lot with a microphone*  
  
Rio: Yo, Rio here for 7UP and I'm here in the Mall of Zion Parking lot for 7UP giving away free samples and taste tests! Oh goody!  
  
*camera switches to Rio at the taste testing table* *downs a whole can of soda in five seconds*  
  
Rio: WHAT ARE YOU LOOKIN' AT? *belches* Opps, 'scuse me! Oh! Customer! Come on over missy! What's your name?  
  
Duet-sama: Shut up before I blast you! *waves around a fake looking squirt gun* Gimme a sample mister!  
  
Rio: *nervous* Uh here! *passes Duet a drink*  
  
Duet-sama: *drinks whole cup* GIMME MORE! Ey what are you doing drinking the samples mister?  
  
Rio: One per person did you not read the sign! *finshes off another sample* NO MORE!  
  
Duet-sama: *on a rampage* It taste bad anyway but I'm thirsty more!!! *squirts her water gun at a sample which topples over*  
  
Rio: Hey! CAREFUL WITH THE MERCHANDISE!  
  
Duet-sama: Shut up n' give me all your loot!  
  
Rio: No way! *glares at camera man* Are you filming?! *camera man smiles and nods*  
  
Duet-sama: You leave me no choice! DIEEE! *she whistles and several preschoolers come out of know where and attack Rio*  
  
Preschooler leader: ATOMIC WEDGIE!!!! *the kids wedgie a helpless Rio*  
  
Rio: OWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!  
  
Preschooler: Now get him with your swords! *the kids pull out sticks and begin beating Rio senseless*  
  
Rio: I KNEW FREE SAMPLES WERE TO GOOD TO BE TRUE!  
  
*lights come up on Rio who looks battered and beaten all his samples are gone and kids are seen in the background frolicking with 7UP*  
  
Rio: Since are samples are *sighs* . missing we'll move on to the taste test. *camera shifts to the taste test table* Here we have Sprite, Mountain Dew, 7UP and Cream puffs. Wait a minute, cream puffs. *Rio devours the whole box* Mmmmm, cream puffs. *tosses box away* OH! Customer!  
  
Anime Cat: Hello!  
  
Rio: Would you like to do a taste test?  
  
Anime Cat: Sure! I'll try!  
  
Rio: Great! *devours extra box of cream puffs* This young lady has volunteered to take the 7UP taste test! She'll tell us which one of these drinks is 7UP and which one taste the best! And all of this will be done. blindfolded! *blindfolds Anime Cat with a blue bandana*  
  
Audience: Oooooooooo, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!  
  
Anime Cat: I taste air..  
  
Rio: IT HASN"T STARTED YET!!!!  
  
Anime Cat: Oh.  
  
Rio: *places three cups on table* Test 1 *hands her a cup that says SPRITE but thanks to the latest blindfold technology she can't see that!* Here you go!  
  
Anime Cat: *sips* It's Sprite! And it taste's the best!  
  
Rio: HOW CAN YOU KNOW IT TASTE THE BEST AND YOU HAVEN"T TASTED THE OTHER TWO YET!!! STICK WITH THE SCRIPT!  
  
Anime Cat: Oh. But I thought there was no script and this was live.  
  
Rio: *whispering to her* Yeah but remember we told you that you had to walk by this stand and say 7UP was the greatest a few days ago right? Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.  
  
Anime Cat: Oh yeah I remember! Right! I mean, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.  
  
Rio: *Rolls his eyes and eats the last of the cream puffs* Test 2* *hands her cup that says MOUNTAIN DEW that she can't see because you know the blindfold*  
  
Anime Cat: It's Mountain Dew! It's the greatest!!!  
  
Rio: AHEM!!!!  
  
Anime Cat: Oh I mean it sucks..  
  
Rio: *to camera* Now for the 7UP! *Rio hands her the last cup while tucking the remaining 1 liter bottle of Sprite into his jacket*  
  
Anime Cat: WOW! This must be the 7UP! How great!  
  
Rio: Yes of course it's great that's cause it's 7UP!  
  
Anime Cat: The taste you can see!  
  
Rio: Wrong Slogan!  
  
Anime Cat: Opps. Hey, who are they? *Anime cat points to Duet-sama and her mob of preschoolers*  
  
Duet-sama: He's got more merchandise! GET EM'!!!!!!!!! *a mob is seen charging towards Rio and the taste test table* *Anime Cat flees for her life and Rio is left behind to be mobbed the camera is knocked over and there is static*  
  
Duet sama: *kicking the camera* Sprite's better anyway..  
  
Well, Rio got to advertise food, well sort of! Now Leena's going to go all out for the poor orphaned children in the remote forests of Brazil! How touching! Think of the chaos. We need guest stars people so review! And hey review also to tell me how bad or good it was!!! C'mon peoples get on out there and review! 


	4. Leena and the Orphans

Well, 16 reviews *whistles* that's more than Adventures at GOA got for four chapters! Which I will update when I get a rare burst of inspiration! School starts tomorrow, so I wanted to get this out before I find myself drowning in homework. Glad you liked Rio in his disaster of an ad. And Duet- sama I have know clue how I knew that you enjoyed commanding preschoolers to do your evil will it just clicked! Anyway here's Leena and those poor, "innocent" orphans in Brazil! She needs your help! Kitten Luv and Karo guest star!  
  
*lights come up on Leena swatting at a fly with a flyswatter and failing*  
  
Leena: Hello! *swat* I'm Leena here in the forests of *swat* Brazil *swat* *she squishes the fly on her forehead* Oh rats!  
  
Director: TAKE 2!  
  
Leena: Hi! I'm Leena here in the forests of Brazil! And I need your help! Yes your help! I'm even talking to the fat couch potatoes! We need everyone to help these poor orphan children!  
  
*camera shifts to a group of orphan children with big innocent eyes*  
  
Leena: THEY NEED YOUR HELP! These poor children are undereducated and undernourished! That's why you need your help to give them a home or at least some food! Just look at these living conditions! *camera shifts to a gigantic mansion made from bamboo complete with water slide* How awful!  
  
Director: Don't use that picture Leena here!!!  
  
*the camera shifts to a shabby hut*  
  
Kitten Luv: *an orphan tugs on Leena's skirt* But Ms. Leena that isn't our house that is *she points back at the gigantic mansion with slide* *camera shuts off and comes on again*  
  
Leena: You've donated 5,000 dollars to these orphans but it's not enough yet! We need you to give, give, give!!!  
  
Garaes: *in background* Make that 5,001 dollars! *he tucks half the money away in his shirt and rides off on a motorcycle before anyone can catch him*  
  
Director: Don't use that footage!!!!!  
  
Leena: These children are also undereducated. They still practice the ancient art of worshipping spirits and idols we need to help them!!! *lights shift to children who are bowing to a giant statue of Hiead*  
  
Karo: *bowing* Hiead-sama, what is your will?  
  
Hiead statue: .... *lightning suddenly strikes the ground*  
  
Karo: *gasps* The great Hiead has spoken he says one shall be taken..  
  
Orphan children: *looking up in the sky* The claw....  
  
*a gigantic claw comes down from the sky and picks an orphan up*  
  
Kitten Luv: I have been chosen fellow orphans to go to GOA! I'll see you! Hiead has spoken! *the claw goes back into the sky*  
  
Orphan children: Thank you master! *they all bow to the gigantic Hiead*  
  
*the camera shifts to Leena*  
  
Leena: What poor children! Living in an illusion like that there is no claw!!!  
  
Camera man: It looked pretty real to me.  
  
Leena: Shut up! *she realizes they are filming and puts on an extremely fake smile* So, please help these poor innocent children to get out of this bad, bad place to live  
  
Karo: Look they've got money! SIEZE THEM!!!!!!!! *orphans spring out of nowhere and attack Leena and her film crew*  
  
Orphans: Moneeeeeeey!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Karo: MWHAHAHAHAHA! Now we can have to water slides and TWO GIANT HIEAD STATUES!!!  
  
Orphans: YAY! *Leena and gang are tied to tree*  
  
Karo: What should we do o, great Hiead-sama? *Hiead walks out of the mansion*  
  
Hiead: Sacrifice. *he smirks evily*  
  
Orphans: *in mob chant* DOOM! DOOM! DOOM! DOOM!  
  
*the camera falls and there is static*  
  
Several days later..  
  
*the glass to the camera is smashed but you can still make out Garaes's face*  
  
Garaes: Garaes, here it seems I'm the only survivor. Heeheehee I've still got the money.  
  
Karo: There he is SEIZE HIM!!!!!!!!  
  
Orphans: *charge* MONEY!!!!!  
  
Kitten Luv: WAIT! I have returned from the great GOA in the sky. HE to is a bishonen~! Spare him and make a Garaes statue!  
  
Orphans: *turn to Garaes* *in dreamlike state* Garaaaaaaaaaaes..  
  
Garaes: I could get used to this...  
  
Disaster strikes! How sad! *sob* Anyway, hope you liked that one! Review please! I need more than one guest star for the next ad! Lanae Kou is the only one I have so far but next up Wrecka and Roose for the best weight loss program ever! So come on in and join the fun! *looks up* The claw.... 


	5. Wrecka and Roose and Weight Loss

Oops! This took longer than expected. School started and I'm drowning in homework! *sobs* However, I will prevail! Chapter 5 is finally here, ne? Lanae Kou, Kat Jen and Tyler you're up to bat. The Dixie Artist and Lady Shadowflame (I guess you want to be written in you didn't say.) keep your eyes pealed you may just find yourself trapped in Chapter 6. Anyone else who requests, you'll be in my next maniacal advertising campaign! MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Okay. roll the tape.  
  
Announcer: We interrupt the Super Bowl! For this extremely important infomercial!  
  
Angry Football fans everywhere: HEY! WHAT THE HECK IS YOUR PROBLEM!  
  
Announcer: For your information I am a proud fanfiction author Lane Kou for you information! And I do not have a problem so just sit down and be quiet and cooperate!!  
  
Angry football fans everywhere: *a mob is beginning to form* NO WAY! WE SHOULDA GOTTEN SATTELITE! LET'S GET 'ER! *a mob charges toward the tv*  
  
Lanae Kou: CEASE! *tv viewing rooms all over the world go completely silent and still* *crickets chirp* *sighs* Thank you. As I was saying. here's your infomercial. *smiles*  
  
*scene jumps to a perky Wrecka and a panting Roose running frantically as he struggles to keep up with an out of control treadmill*  
  
Wrecka: Hi I'm Wrecka! And I'm the creator of a revolutionary breakthrough in weight loss technology!! *smiles and looks "innocent"* *audience gasps* I know it's shocking! But thanks to this workout routine I've planned you'll lose weight in no time!  
  
Roose: Yeah! Just look at the difference it made in me! WHOA! *he slips and falls onto the treadmill and is sent hurdling into a nearby wall* Ouch.. *before and after pictures are shown of Roose and the audience Oooh's and Ahh's accordingly*  
  
*the camera shifts back to Wrecka holding up Ooooh! Ahhh signs* *she quickly tosses them away*  
  
Wrecka: *giggling nervously* Ehehehehe. It's great stuff! And Roose isn't the only one raving about it!  
  
Roose: What are you talking about! I hate it! I practically starved! *Wrecka kicks him to shut him up and that comment is poorly edited out*  
  
Wrecka: We'll send you these to wonderful workout videos and diet charts to get you started on your weight loss journey!! *Wrecka holds up videos* For only 10 monthly installments of 19.95. ONLY 19.95!  
  
Roose: Actually it would end up being around 995.95 in the end of the 10 install- *Roose is kicked again and the comment is poorly replaced*  
  
Wrecka: *muttering* Shut up moron! Oh anyway! Here is a another satisfied customer showing their support. *scene shifts to Tyler angrily sitting in front of a camera*  
  
Tyler: Yeah, Wrecka and Roose helped me a lot! I lost 15 pounds in one week. Thank you Wrecka Weight Loss! *camera shows before and after pictures of Tyler and it's obvious it's not even the same person*  
  
Tyler: I said the speech can I have my money now? *camera man chuckles nervously and begins turning the camera back towards Wrecka*  
  
Tyler: HEY! HEY! ANSWER ME YOU DOLT!  
  
*lights up on Wrecka*  
  
Wrecka: And if you buy now we'll even include our Tai Bo video with our famous instructor Kat Jen! Here's a sneak peak! *snippet of video begins to play*  
  
Kat Jen: Greetings citizens! By watching this video you are being trained to be part of my Tai Bo army! You will act upon my every command when I say this word: Okefenokee.  
  
Tai Bo Students: Yes master...  
  
Kat Jen: And that includes our viewers at home to. Punch to the right! *video cuts off* *Wrecka stares at screen blankly*  
  
Roose: No wonder it's free.  
  
Wrecka: Quiet you! SO you get all this great stuff for only 19.95! 10 installments of ONLY 19.95! Order today at 555-555-5556 that's 555-555- 5556.  
  
Tyler: *storming in* MY MONEY! GIMME!  
  
Director: And cut!  
  
Wrecka: Hmph. We'll make millions.  
  
Roose: I'm hungry.  
  
Tyler: MY MONEY!  
  
Director: Speaking of money, *chuckles nervously* Due to reasons I can't explain, your not getting paid today, or tommrow or the day after that. I SPENT ALL YOUR SALARIES! GOTTA GO! *director runs out screaming*  
  
Roose: LET GET HER!!!!! *Wrecka, Roose and Tyler storm after the director all while the camera is rolling*  
  
Wrecka: GET BACK HERE K-CHAN! YOU OWE ME LUNCH!  
  
Tyler: MY MONEY!!!  
  
Cameraman: Not available in stores.  
  
*camera shifts back to our announcer Lanae Kou*  
  
Lanae Kou: We now return to the Super Bowl which is. *glances at her watch* Oh no. It's over! You should've gotten satellite!  
  
Football fans: NOO! THAT'S IT GET HER!  
  
Lanae: CEASE! *silence* *more silence*  
  
Yu: *appears from nowhere* *holds up a sign that says "Silence is golden.*  
  
Random fanfic author known as Cloud: *pointing* THAT'S THAT FREAK WHO ATTACKED ME AT AMC! If we should be mad at anyone we should be mad at HIM! LET'S GET HIM! *Cloud and football fans run after Yu leaving Lanae alone*  
  
Lanae: We now return you to your scheduled programming. Which is the Piolit Candidate Marathon followed by the Lanae Kou Talk Show with scheduled guest Azuma. Goodnight everyone! *Lane waves bye to all her loyal fans and the end*  
  
Who knew weight loss could be so horrifying and painful! Tune in next time when the long awaited commercial with Hiead. Yes our favorite candidate Hiead advertising contacts. Colored contacts. And since there so many requests for it somehow he'll be in his underwear. Now how will I manage that. Hmmm.. Well Review! Please! And you can IM me too! I love to talk! And I'll still take requests and write ins! C ya'll in Chapter 6! 


	6. Hiead and Colored Contacts

Well I'm back! Barely had any homework today! Meaning, an update no da! Actually I did half of it in science but YOU don't need to know that. Anyway, the long awaited advertisement with Hiead our. friend. OR IS HE? DUN DUN DUN! The Dixie Artist and Lady Shadowflame your up! *sob* This is the first time I don't have a waiting list. Could it be this is getting less popular! *bawls moronically* Wait what? Duet-sama wants to be tortured so more. The preschooler controller. Idea.. MWHAHAHA! Review to be written in to Chapter 7 or 6! MWHAHAHAHA! DUN DUN DUN!  
  
Announcer: NEW! IMPROVED THE BEST THING EVER GOA BRAND COLORED CONTACTS! *the announcer is shoved out the way and The Dixie Artist takes his place*  
  
The Dixie Artist: Moron. Anywho I'm your real announcer The Dixie Artist! *applause* I know. I know. I'm brilliant! *more applause* I know I deserve applause. *louder applause* Yes and *applause* I'm here to *applause* tell you about *thunderous clapping and cheers* To tell you to *clapping* SHUT UP! ALL OF YOU SHUT UP! *crickets chirp* Thank you. Crickets you're spared for now but I was talking to you as well. *silence* GOA contacts are colorful and cheap. And they're revolutionary. Let's take a look and see how they changed this boy's life.  
  
*scene shifts to a sleepy silver haired boy we all know yawn and stretch while eating his breakfast*  
  
The Dixie Artist: *hiding behind a houseplant* This is Hiead. Yesterday we put some of our revolutionary products on him and he didn't notice. See how his life has changed.  
  
Hiead: *standing up* Hey who's there. I thought I had a restrainer order against you psycho fangirls.  
  
The Dixie Artist: *hopping out from behind a bush* Hi Hiead!  
  
Hiead: What the? Just stay right there or I'll. *glances around and grabs a plastic fork* poke you until you bleed and you lie on the floor twitching whilst I glare down at you laughing manically. Mwhahahaha...  
  
The Dixie Artist: Okay. Right. Have you noticed anything about how your life has changed.  
  
Hiead: No, now get out before I find something more suitable to injure you with.  
  
The Dixie Artist: *nervous* Well uh ehehehe have you checked your messages?  
  
Hiead: *glaring* No. I was training for my battle with Force. Hmph. But I'll grant you this last request maybe.  
  
The Dixie Artist: Quit being difficult! You win that battle anyways.  
  
Hiead: I do?! WOW! I mean. Hmph. *Hiead clicks his answering machine button*  
  
Answering Machine: You have fifteen. hundred messages.  
  
Hiead: *his faces pales* That is a bit above average. *The Dixie Artist tosses him a mirror*  
  
The Dixie Artist: Notice anything different.  
  
Hiead: *looking in mirror* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *a person tosses Hiead out the screen*  
  
Lady Shadowflame: AHAHAHAHAHA! I'm Lady Shadowflame. One of the satisfied customers here! OHOHOHOHOHOHOHO! This product has changed my boyfriend Clay's life!  
  
The Dixie Artist: Clay. Man. I feel sorry for you.  
  
Lady Shadowflame: I suggest you be quiet or feel the wrath of my laser gun! *The Dixie Artist is silent* Look at this before and after footage!  
  
*a clip rolls of Clay walking through the hallway pushing his glasses up* *Lady Shadowflame narrates*  
  
Lady Shadowflame: *voiceover* My dear Clay was such a bright guy. But to everyone shares the same affection for him that I do.  
  
The Dixie Artist: Tell me about it.  
  
Lady Shadowflame: Quiet you! Stop messing up my lines! Anyway Clay wasn't respected. He was a little lacking in the social side of things, and he had all the time in the world to study because you know no social life.  
  
*a shot is shown of Clay getting run over during change time* *another shot is shown of him getting a swirlie in the guys bathroom by a guy who looks a lot like Hiead*  
  
Lady Shadowflame: Like a said little social life, oh how am I kidding the kid's an OUTCAST! Oh *ahem*yes. Clay does keep to himself however something is about to change his life.  
  
*while Clay is being brutally run over by tenth graders his glasses fall and break*  
  
Clay: NO! NOT MY GLASSES!  
  
Lady Shadowflame: But then he got some GOA contact lenses and he hasn't been run over since! Why everyone loves Clay now! *there is a shot of Clay surrounded by kids at lunch while he attempts to freestyle*  
  
Lady Shadowflame: Thanks GOA contacts! And I must be going to get some myself! OHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO! See ya around weirdo! *Lady Shadowflame disappears in a fury of black rose petals*  
  
The Dixie Artist: GET BACK HERE! I AM NOT A WIERDO! Oh uh I mean! This is why you should buy our revolutionary product!  
  
Hiead: My eyes are naturally red you stupid people didn't do anything!  
  
The Dixie Artist: Now Hiead you shouldn't lie.  
  
Hiead: I'm serious. Just as serious as I am about killing you if you don't get out of my room right now!  
  
The Dixie Artist: Ah! Okay! *her cellphone rings* Hold on just a sec! Yes. Hello. What do YOU MEAN OUR SALES ARE DOWN! Grr. No. No I don't want to be fired. Oh. I have an idea. *she shuts of her phone* Bye Hiead I was just leaving.  
  
Hiead: *watching her leave* Hmph. Bout time you've excepted that I was born with my eyes the perfect shade of scarlet. What are you doing?  
  
The Dixie Artist: GOTCHA! *she sneaks behind him and pulls his pants down revealing boxers* THAT'S RIGHT! BUY GOA COLORED CONTACTS AND RECEIVE A POSTER OF HIEAD IN HIS UNDERWEAR FREE! AND YOU SHOULD ALL GO READ AND REVIEW ANIMATESS'S YU GI OH FIC NOW OR YOUR POSTER WILL BE REDUCED TO SMOULDERING ASHES! (see I Shamelessly Advertised your fic!)  
  
Hiead: *pulling his pants up* WHAT?!  
  
THE Dixie Artist: No time to explain! Gotta run! Bye!  
  
Hiead: Get back here! Right NOW! *both run out the apartment*  
  
Lady Shadowflame: *strolling on with her cellphone* Say what? Sales have doubled in the past 10 seconds?! AND I get Dixie-chan's bonus right? I do! Thank you! *shuts off cellphone* Hmm. I wonder what they did?  
  
Later that day...  
  
The Dixie Artist: *hanging of a weak limb of two trees sitting on top of the ledge of an impossible to climb cliff* Uh Hiead. It's been 3 hours. Let me down now. Hiead. Hiead! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!e Another advertisement failure! How sad! Well Hiead has been DONE! Finally, ne? And please go read Animatess's Yu Gi Oh fic The Musketeers, it's really good as she needs reviews! I'm taking requests and suggestions still. I was thinking Garaes for hair dye and Ernest for life insurance. What do ya'll think! R&R! Peace till Chapter 7! IM me! I love to talk! 


	7. Zero and Dell Computers

Hello! Hello! Hello! I'm back from wherever I disappeared from for the past few days. Although I said this Chapter would be about Garaes and hair dye and changed my mind! MWHAHAHAHAHA! I can do that! I'm the author! Nah nah! Okay, I'll stop being immature but this chapter is all about our friend Zero and Dell computers! Yippe! Yay! Yay! Have no fear Gareas and friends will be back next chapter! I'm still taking write ins and suggestions! I NEED THEM! Anyway onwards! Sessol and Heather your up to bat! And Sessol thank you for the suggestions! I'll try to keep that in mind! Here we go! Oh yeah, Silfee and Kirsten you have been mystically chosen to be in the Garaes ad! I know! You can thank me later! Here we go!  
  
*scene comes up on a lovely college campus with bushes and children stroll calmly*  
  
Narrator: This is The University of GOA in Wyoming. Here is a very special young man. The subject of our story today. His name is Zero.  
  
*Zero strolls on screen carrying books*  
  
Narrator: Zero is a little different from everyone else. He's. uh you'll see.  
  
*scene shifts to Zero in class. Everyone is writing complicated equations on windows and on the board meanwhile Zero is punching numbers into a baby calculator that won't even take decimals*  
  
Narrator: Very different from everyone..  
  
Director: *yelling at the narrator* Heather, speak into your mike we can't hear you!!!  
  
Heather: *being abnoxious* I'm not listening! I'm not listening! Can't here you! Must be the wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiind!!!!!!!!!!! *pops back in to character* Yes. Yes. While everyone else is yearning for learning Zero is . not.  
  
*scene shifts to band class and all the students are playing a Bach Concerto with ease meanwhile Zero is struggling to toot out "Hot Cross Buns" on his trumpet*  
  
Heather: And not only were Zero's problem solving skills a musical ability different *pause for "dramatic" effect* So were his *DUN DUN DUN* GRADES!!!!!  
  
*Clay and many other students open there report cards and find straight A's. Zero finds 7 lovely F's.*  
  
Zero: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
  
Heather: It wasn't long until Zero got a message from the dreaded guidance counselor Sessol! *scene shifts to Zero*  
  
Zero: *holding a letter* Oh NO! A message from the dreaded guidance counselor Sessol!  
  
*Zero trudges towards the Sessol's office with his head hung low*  
  
Heather: Zero trudged to the office, letter and report card in hand! Who knows what DOOM could await him!  
  
*Sessol is talking to her assistant in her office*  
  
Assistant: But Sessol you just corrected the last dumb student in the school how are we supposed to get torture tips from Azuma now he's all the way on the otherside of town!  
  
Sessol: Oh be quiet K-chan! Why must you question my ingenuis plan! The last retarded excuse for a college student is on his way now and -  
  
Assistant: But your plans never work! You've wasted so many empty vessels on delivering messages. They could've been copying worksheets!!!  
  
Sessol: NONSENSE! Quiet K-chan. The dumb students and I have built many a evil plan. And I still need them for abolishing addictive nicotines, gum , baby food , laxatives. and now this kid can get torture tips for us.  
  
Assistant: How will that help-  
  
Sessol: Must I explain everything to you!!! Normally we'd have to go to the forest, pick the torture tips up, drive back here, use them, call Azuma and thank him and then a week later we'd go to the forest, pick the torture tips up, drive back here, use them, call Azuma  
  
Assistant: *sniffle* I get it. Okay. And now you're going to use this new kid to do all the work for us right?  
  
Sessol: NO YOU POOE EXCUSE FOR AN AUTHOR! We're gonna use this new kid to do all the work for us!  
  
Assistant: Great idea! Hey. Wait a minute.. *someone knocks on the door and the diabolical planning period is postponed*  
  
Sessol: *runs to her desk and tosses her world takeover overhead slides into a cabinet* *she shoves her assistant out the back door and dives into her huge rolling armchair*You may come in.  
  
Zero: *peaking through the door* Hello Ms. Sessol. I came like you asked. I tried to improve my grades but my computer busted and I can't type up my papers and.  
  
Sessol: Hush Zero. Sit down please. Now this is the third time you've been put on probation. Zero it's ridiculous to fail OLYMPIC HISTORY when the teacher is MUTE~! Augh!  
  
Zero: I tried! Honest! But I'm tired of being put down! I'm leaving this stupid college!  
  
Sessol: NO! You can't do that! I need you for my diabolical *realizes her flaw* I mean people need you here! Zero. Zero. Zero. C'mon kiddo. What do we do when we fall off a horse?  
  
Zero: *sits there pondering the question* What do we do. what. we do.. *he's obviously stumped*  
  
Sessol: *shaking her head* We get back on.  
  
Zero: Sorry Sessol I'm not a gymnast. *he turns to leave*  
  
Sessol: Eh? Zero not a real horse I mean your grades! It was an analogy! You can get C's and B's I know you can!  
  
Zero: Hmph. *suddenly times stands still and another Zero appears in front of Zero he is dressed nicely and has several books tucked under his arm*  
  
Zero 2: Dude. Get a Dell. It'll make you smarter man!  
  
Several days later.  
  
*Zero is solving complicated trigonometry problems with his fellow classmates for a recreational activity*  
  
Heather: So Thanks to his Dell computer Zero was saved from flunking out of GOA!  
  
*Zero turns in a typed term paper smiling happily*  
  
Zero 2: AND RIGHT now Dell is giving away FREE INGRIDS! That's right free INGRIDS! In our Ingrid a day giveaway!!!  
  
Satisfied customer Sessol: MWHAHAHAHAHA! My Ingrid won't even fit in my back yard! IT'S PERFECT FOR MY WORLD TAKEOVER GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  
  
Assistant: *from Ingrid cockpit* You know they're filming right?  
  
Sessol: OF COURSE I KNOW! Oh my gosh, K-chan did you know they're filiming?!  
  
Assistant: Why do I even bother?  
  
Zero 2: So get on out there and BUY A DELL!  
  
Zero: YEAH MAN! *talking very fast* Chances of you winning and Ingrid our slim to none. See rules for details..  
  
*in the background a building is smashed in half by a rampaging Ingrid* *students are running away in panic* *chaos ensues*  
  
Zero 2: BUY TODAY!  
  
Well. Well. Well. That was a little insane now wasn't it. Now it's finally time for GARAES!!! Everybody cheer! Now I'm still doing write ins and suggestions are always greatly appreciated! See ya'll in Chapter 8! Peace! Is it me or was that one not as funny as the last few. 


	8. Garaes and Hair Dye

DAH! I AM SORRY THIS HAS TAKEN SO LONG!!! I've had to back to back Georgia history projects that have taken up most of my time not to mention a collaboration fic with shadow priestess entitled THE FACE which you should all read and review. The pen name is shadow priestess and K-chan! MWHAHAHA! Anyways as promised Silfee and Kirsten your DOOOOOOM awaits! DAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh yeah this is the first time in a while two chapters are booked! Miki and Lalita your in Chapter 9 and ChaosandEvil and FistfighterMina (Hi Al!) are chapter 10. So if you want to guest star you'll have to wait till chapter 11 unless I change my twisted lil' mind. IDEAS ARE NEEDED! IF YOU HAVE ONE NO MATTER HOW WEIRD PUT IT IN A REVIEW. please! Anyway.. Here is.. Garaes and Hair Dye!  
  
*the strange setting just happens to be a strange street where a very strange normal looking boy with brown hair is walking and a awfully familiar but strange voice begins to narrate*  
  
Strange voice: Hi my name's Garaes. And despite popular belief my voice is not strange. And despite yet another popular belief by strange Amazon children I am not from the great claw in the sky and I do enjoy being a giant gold statue but anyway we're missing the point.  
  
Random Kid: *jumping into the middle of the road reaching for his ball* There's a point?  
  
Garae's voice: YES THERE IS A POINT! Hey kid. Look.  
  
Random boy in green: *shoving kid out the way of a speeding car* KID LOOK OUT!  
  
*the boy is run over and twitching on the ground and then sent to the spirit world*  
  
Random boy's spirit: FOR THE LOVE OF PETE THIS IS THE SECOND DERN TIME NOW!!!! *floats off mumbling* (pardon the YYH pun)  
  
Garaes's voice: That was completely off subject. Anyway back to what I was mentioning. See that poor brown haired kid walking down the street, well that my friends is me. My life was terrible..  
  
*As Garaes waits for the pep band to finish parading by his foot is run over by a ignorant bicycling bimbo, which causes him to shout in pain hop around panicking, which rams him into a football player who was angered and in turn throws him into the dumpster*  
  
Garaes: What did I do to deserve this? At least I'm not late for Azuma's class yet. *bell rings* Well. nevermind. It couldn't get any worse than this I suppose.  
  
*suddenly lightning flashes and a downpour begins only over Garaes's dumpster*  
  
Garaes: What the heck is WRONG WITH THIS WEATHER?! *Garaes hops out the dumpster, decides to skip school while the thundercloud follows him off campus*  
  
Garaes's voice: That was a typical day in my life until. something stranger than a thundercloud hovering over me happened.  
  
Garaes: Huh the thundercloud hovering over me disappeared! Wha?  
  
*a strange maniacal clown skips towards Garaes's honking a horn in his poor face cackling madly*  
  
Silfee: Hee! Hee! Hee! I'm Silfee the cackling maniacal clown! My you look lonely little boy walking to school all by your lonesome little self! Hee hee hee!  
  
Garaes: Go away! Freak! If you're a clown why the heck aren't you dressed like one?  
  
Silfee: Temper , emper young man! Silfee only tries to help you that she does! Heeheehee! Here take this bottle it'll increase your. popularity HEE! HEE! HEE!  
  
*clown holds a hairdye bottle out to Garaes*  
  
Garaes: No way! The instructor would never let me dye my hair!  
  
Silfee: Who listens to the freak Azuma anyway! Hee hee hee! Just let me spray some..  
  
Garaes: LOOK OUT!  
  
*a car comes rearing down the sidewalk brutalizing the clown and leaving a bloody mess on the pavement*  
  
Silfee: *reaching up towards Garaes* I shall return in approximately 37 seconds.. Ugh  
  
*out of nowhere the fateful ER "Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep" of a heart monitor is heard as the clown falls limp*  
  
Garaes: Oh my.  
  
Driver: *a strange girl looking remarkable like an author we all know screams* GOOD GRACIOUS! Fifth one this mornin'! I'm losing my touch. *continues speeding away*  
  
*37 seconds later*  
  
Garaes: AAAAAH! Oh my god! The strange clown! YOU'RE A FLOATING PICETURE!  
  
Silfee: Yes I'm a floating picture. What you never seen a floating picture before? I'm warning you Garaes just take the hairdye and the world will be a better place.  
  
Garaes: No way! I don't trust floating pictures! That goes twice floating pictures of clowns! Now if you'll excuuuuse me I'm going back to school! *Gareas storms away from Silfee back towards school*  
  
Silfee: So hard headed..  
  
Garaes's voice: And so I trudged back into school right as the 2nd period bell rang only to find a couple of those annoying freshman blocking my path.  
  
Kirsten: Yo buster! Don't you know this is 9th grade hallway space. We'd be extremely grateful if you left our hall.  
  
Garaes: Oh yeah and what are a whole bunch of puny freshman gonna do about it. Respect your seniors!  
  
*Kirsten and her flunkies all crack their knuckles in unison*  
  
Kirsten: Just because we're younger doesn't mean were weaker. Besides there's. *turns around to count her group* 5 of us! And one of you!  
  
Random Flunky: Actually there 7 of us your greatness Kirsten ma'am.  
  
Kirsten: Is that so?  
  
Random Flunky: *nervous* Yes. ma'am..  
  
Kirsten: I AM YOUR BOSS! AND I DON'T CARE HOW MANY OF US THERE ARE! I WAS SIMPLY TESTING YOUR COUNTING SKILLS OKAY! OKAY? YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT!!!!  
  
Random Flunky: No. I don't suppose I do.  
  
Kirsten: LET HTAT BE A LESSON NEVER CORRECT THE GREAT KIRSTEN!  
  
Flunky Army: Sir yes sir!  
  
Kirsten: *holding battle axe* What was that?  
  
Flunky Army: We mean ma'am yes ma'am! *Garaes creeping away*  
  
Kirsten: Don't let the senior escape! WET WILLIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  
  
*the freshman attack Garaes and put their fingers in their mouths and then in Garaes's ears. Garaes crumples to the floor hollering in terror while Kirsten's army throws him in the oh so familiar dumpster*  
  
Kirsten: Let that be a lesson to you senior. C'mon guys let's go see how many times we have to poke Yu before he talks!  
  
Flunkies: YAY! *Kirsten and friends leave Garaes to suffer in the stinky trash dispenser*  
  
Garaes: *climbing out dumpster* What did I ever do wrong? GAH! NO IT'S YOU AGAIN!  
  
Silfee: *floating on a broom* Yes! You should've listened to me. It seems you're well despised by those younger than you!  
  
Garaes: I guess I could try your hair dye. Two dumpsters per day is getting to be to much for me.  
  
Garaes's voice: So I went home and dyed my hair was grounded for two weeks but hey I'm well loved by my peers now!  
  
*Garaes running down a hall followed by a ton of Garaes fan girls and Kirsten n' friends*  
  
Kirsten: OH ME GOSH I GOT HIS BACK PACK!!!!!  
  
*Kirsten is mobbed by persons around her simply trying to touch the book carrying item*  
  
Silfee: Now in three colors Hiead silver, Garu green, and Erts blonde! BUY TODAY!!!!!!  
  
Garaes: AND MAKE SURE YOU DON'T HAVE TO MANY FANGIRLS!!!!!!!!!!! *Garaes is lost sight of because he's swarmed by zillions of hopeful piolit candidates and people asking suggestions for the respect your seniors march*  
  
Silfee: Only 20 monthly installments of 19.95! We're being to nice! We're giving these things away! ORDER NOW! AVAILABLE AT WALGREEN'S!  
  
Mission Complete! What next? You ask! What next? I dunno you tell me! The next chapter won't take as long to get out! I PROMISE! Read and Review! SUGGESTIONS ARE NEEDED! Phew. The end. You can click the submit review button now! 


	9. Azuma and Edmucation that Pays

OH NO! I'm not dead! I'm not severely injured! I'm not gone from this Earth! I was not reduced to smoldering ashes by an alien laser gun. Which means the sick and deranged chapters of this story can continue! Disappointed? I'm sure you are. Two tears for you then. *tear, tear* OKAY! Enough with the giant welcoming party already, we got some catching up to do. I'm sorry I haven't been around but my grandmother was and still is very ill, along with a few other family difficulties. This is still an ongoing crisis, so please bear with me if updates aren't as frequent. It's not intentional and I'm trying!!! I was also suffering from writer's block and severe lack of ideas, which is probably why this chapter which could've been great is not nearly as good as it should be. Again I apologize my mind has not been with me for the past month or so. Until I drug my limp body over to the keyboard to look at my dedicated reviewers to find and IDEA I could use. IT was then I began madly typing this intro to this chapter. EDUCATION PAYS WITH AZUMA! Thank you, Ekira. You are a genius. Flowers for you! And yes you can guest star. But there's a waiting list. For marvelous Chapter 9 Mika and Lalita, you're up! And for Chapter 10 we have two of my very strange friends ChaosandEvil01 (Yo!) and GurlFistFighterMina (let's shorten that to Mina.). And for the big Chapter 11 Finale! Oh my gosh it's gonna be the end?! Erika and anyone else who wants to join the insanity. There's no limit to the number in the grand finale. And it's not even a commercial it's a road trip to go film a commercial. Oooooooooooh. And I'll even be in that last chapter and as a bonus in a review type what sort of torture you would like me to undergo for ruining your lives in my fiction. Enough of the rambling, it's time for us to get some edumucation. ROLL THE TAPE!  
  
*lights come up on a city street where an ambulance whizzes by and kids a playing good ol' fashion street basketball*  
  
Azuma: Hello Azuma here. Look here are they city streets. And I have here with me a boy. Some said he was beyond help. Some said he was just plain stupid. BUT I DIDN'T BELIEVE THAT! Why with a little schooling this boy could be the next the next. ME!  
  
Yamagi: Yo! What up dawg?! Am I on TV! A shout out to my homies on the East side! Class of 06 ALL DA WAY!!!  
  
Azuma: *shoving Yamagi behind him* This boy is not beyond help. What you make on your report card kid?  
  
Yamagi: D's and F's! My highest grade was a 70! I passed yo!  
  
Azuma: *mumbling* This is gonna be harder than I thought. *he smokes a cigarette in frustration*  
  
Yamagi: EY MAN! Smoking is bad! Gimee that! *Yamagi grabs the cigarette and stomps it out* DIE PRODUCT OF DEATH! DIE!!!  
  
Azuma: HOW DARE YOU! I AM YOUR SUPIEROR!  
  
Yamagi: Says who?????  
  
Azuma: SAYS ME!!! *a violent fight ensues in which the camera is thrown over the lens cracks and the cameraman is seen fleeing in another direction*  
  
*lights come up again, a new cameraman and camera are in place*  
  
Lalita: HI!!!!!! LIKE! LIKE! HI! I'm the like Education pays like spokesperson. We've liked helped um. thousands of children to like READ n' stuff! Yeah! *giggles madly*  
  
*a huge chart flies in from out of nowhere*  
  
Chart: I'm a chart!  
  
Lalita: Like duh! Be quiet chart so I can read you!  
  
Chart: I have numbers on me!  
  
Lalita: Obviously. Now shut up..  
  
Chart: Why?! I'm a pretty chart!  
  
Lalita: Like so. No one cares they're paying to see me not a stupid chart! Like dudes we need another chart! This one's stupid!  
  
Chart: I'm not stupid! I'm a chart! I have numbers on me! I'm a pretty chart!  
  
Lalita: OH BE QUIET!!!!!! STUPID THING!!!! *Lalita kicks chart*  
  
Chart: Chart is angry! CHART ANGRY!  
  
Lalita: SO WHAT?! As I was like saaaaaaaying we've helped children all around. GOA's most like advanced pilots went through our program! This chart obviously didn't go through the program, that's why it's so like. dumb! *giggles madly once more*  
  
Chart: Chart's have feelings too! *Chart cries*  
  
Onlookers: Awwwwwwwwwwww......  
  
Lalita: Please.  
  
Chart: Chart angry! *Chart tackles Lalita wraps her up with it's "chartish" powers and throws itself and Lalita down a hill*  
  
Lalita: LIKE AAAAAAAH! I don't like hills. I don't like rolling. And I DON'T LIKE ROLLING DOWN LIKE HILLS!!! AAAAAH! Camera guys! Like MOVE!  
  
*Lalita wrapped in the chart rolls into the camera equipment (and cameramen) tossing everything every which way like they're bowling pins*  
  
Cameraman: Day 10 of Education pays project. Failed. Camera crew destroyed. Agent Lalita still rolling down Main street. *cameraman reaches towards camera and collapses*  
  
*Several days and camera crew later*  
  
Azuma: *his arm is in a sling* Education Pays is a wonderful program. We've decided to stick with safer tactics and just so you before and afters of our best students!  
  
Yamagi: *pointing* That's the guy! THE ONE WHO SAID I WAS BEYOND SAVING!!!  
  
Yamagi's mob of short people: Let's get em'! CHARGE!!!  
  
Azuma: No! *tosses his cigarette away and runs* THIS IS NOT HOW YOU RESPECT YOUR SENIORS!!!! ROLL THE TAPE!  
  
Yamagi: Smoking is bad!!!! After him boys!!!  
  
*The screen switches to a prerecorded tape*  
  
*a small little child who by some miracle of gawd has kept her sanity strolls up to the fallen camera*  
  
Prerecorded tape: Stop kicking me! Stop ruining my prerecordedness!!!  
  
Mika: No mercy for the tape people must know what happened to their education reform friends!!! *Mika continues abusing the tape*  
  
Prerecorded tape: Aaah! Mercy! I'm slipping from my recorded previously state! NOOOOOOO! *prerecorded tape snaps off and Mika's eye can be seen in the camera*  
  
Mika: Hey is this thing on? Ooooooooooooooh! I can see myself.. What does this button do???  
  
Fallen Cameraman: Noo. Anything but that button!!!  
  
Mika: Why?  
  
Fallen Cameraman: Because it's not good little girl not good at all.  
  
Mika: Why?  
  
Fallen Cameraman: Because it's a destructive button..  
  
Mika: Why?  
  
Cameraman: BECAUSE I STINKIN SAID SO FER CRYIN OUT LOUD!!!!  
  
Mika: *sniffling* Gee Mr. YOU'RE SO MEAN TO MEEEEEEEEE!!!! *begins wailing*  
  
Cameraman: Please.  
  
Mika: *grinning madly* Meaning I'll push the button! *Mika slams her fist on the red button*  
  
*INSERET STATIC AND LOTS OF IT*  
  
*a small line of words trails across the screen*  
  
Operation Education Pays.... TOTAL FAILURE.  
  
That took an unreasonable amount of time and as I go back and read it, it wasn't very good. I again apologize for my lack of assertiveness in getting these updates up. I promise the next chapter will hopefully be up by the end of this week. And then the grand finale after that! The end is near my dear friends. The next chapter seems to be funnier than this it's for the Neurolizer (the thing the use in Men In Black to erase your memory. yeah that thing). It's proving to be an insane little thing. Someone gets to spontaneously turn into a snow otter. Well I'm sorry for this crappy chapter my sense of humor was knocked dry for quite a few days due to excessive homework and illness in the family. Again you're author apologizes and hopes that this shall not happen again. Toodles till next time! ^_^ READ AND REVIEW! Ideas, suggestions, wanna be written in, ways for me to go through strange acts of pain in the final chapter? Include one or more of one of the items on that list IN YOUR REVIEW! So why are you standing here?? Go, go! REVIEW! 


	10. Force and The Neurolizer

This update has taking a VERY long time coming and for this I am sorry. It's been a mixture of lots and lots of schoolwork, family crisis, violin and quartet gigs, acting auditions and so many other time consuming things that have kept be from updating since early December. I'm sure I've lost about half my readers but hey, if there's a whole new slew of people reading this bring it on! But I don't break promises. I said GirlFistFighterMina and ChaosandEvil would be guest starring this chapter and they shall! They show must go on! Please read and review! There are two more chapters after this one so you still have a chance to get in and the final chapter will be a huge grand finale so get set! Still taking ideas as well! Let's see if your author hasn't lost her writing touch! CUE THE TAPE!!!! This one is for Force and the Men in Black Neurolizer. Uh oh I smell. trouble  
  
*lights up on Force walking down the school hallway*  
  
Force: *voiceover* Sometimes. well most of the time I'm just a normal popular irrationally good lookin' upperclassmen *Force does a royalty wave to all of the fangirls swarming behind him*  
  
Mina: He waved at ME! Did you see that?!  
  
Onlooker 1: It was obviously to me! Duh you just can't see! Try like GOA colored contacts or something to get like UN-blind!  
  
Mina: *cracking knuckles* I said he was waving at me so he was WAVING AT ME OKAY?!  
  
Onlooker: You wanna start something!  
  
Mina: YEAH I WOULD! *the two start a scuffle in the middle of the crowd*  
  
Force: Girls, girls, girls can't we all just. get along?  
  
Both: NO!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*scene shifts to a party with Force still the view of the camera*  
  
Force: *voiceover continued* Like I said irrationally good looking. But I hate starting fights among others it makes me feel. guilty. HAHA! WHO AM I KIDDING? It's hilarious! Watching the lower classmen squish each other like bugs while I watch on the sidelines and laugh manically. MWHAAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Erts: *wandering over* Uh force you okay there bud you look a little uh. how should I say this. maniacal?  
  
Force: *shouting* MAYBE BECAUSE I AM! MWHAHAHAHAHA! I WILL RULE THE WORLD!!!!! FIRST ZION THEN THE UNIVERSE GAHAHAHAHA *whole room stares at him*  
  
Azuma: *on phone* Yeah police we gotta psycho at 10 o clock!  
  
Erts: Force do you really mean that? Are you okay. I mean your normally so er quiet  
  
Force: *dazed and yelling* OF COURSE I MEAN IT! I'm tired of being silent noone knows anything about me except for I fought Hiead, Well ya know what I didn't just fight Hiead! I DO LOTS OF OTHER THINGS TOO! OKAY OTHER THINGS!  
  
Erts: *semi-horrified* Okay Force that's nice, you should sit down now!  
  
Force: IM NOT SITTING! Standing is nice! As I was SAYING, I do lots of other things like picking flowers, planning HIEADS BRUTALIZING DEATH and of course IM SOO PRETTY OH SO PRETTY! IM GAY! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!  
  
All: *Huge gasps*  
  
Mina: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *faints*  
  
Force: Oh crap. I meant as in happy gay oh crap oh crap. * of course noone hears Force due to the pandemonium that's going on*  
  
Chaos: OKAY FREEZE! *scene stops* Have you ever said something you didn't want the world to hear?  
  
Force: Why yes.  
  
Chaos: Something so incredibly out of place it made you seem really, really weird..  
  
Force: Yes!  
  
Chaos: A mistake so big it revealed all your diabolical plots to the general public?!!!!  
  
Force: YES! YES! YES! Will you quit these torturing questions!  
  
Chaos: THEN HAVE I GOT THE SOLUTION FOR YOU!  
  
Force: R-really?  
  
Chaos: Duh. it's an infomericial it always works like this I ask the rhetorical questions that you SHOULDN'T have been answering and at the end I come up with this really ingenius product that you just must have.  
  
Force: *nodding furiously* WHAT IS IT!  
  
Chaos: *in peppy advertiser voice* Why it's a neurolizer! Just like in Men in Black one lash of this thing and your problems will be solved! Your friends will forget every stupid little thing you just said and your popularity will be RESTORED!  
  
Force: GIMEE GIMEE GIMEE!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Chaos: Oh fine. *hands him a shiny neurolizer*  
  
Force: AHAHAHAHAHA! *scene unfreezes*  
  
Mina: Haha, let's all laugh and point at the freak with no social future!  
  
All party goers: *pointing at Force* HA HA! Freak with no social future!  
  
Force: Oh yeah. *puts on sunglasses* HahahahahahaAHAHAHA! *light flashes*  
  
Mob of Girls: *no recollection of Force's fluke* Force we love YOU!  
  
Force: I know. I know. It's good to be back!!!  
  
Chaos: *peaking in* And that's just one of our satisfied customers there's so many more situations the neurolizer can be used in! *scene switches to Clay being pounded on by bullies*  
  
Bully 1: Shut up punk! One more word out of you nerd boy and will give you a wedgie so bad you're not gonna walk straight for weeks!  
  
Clay: Oh yeah! Well your mama's so fat she sat on the rainbow and skittles fell out! Wait Wait! AH! That was old! *about to get punched* NEUROLIZER!! *clay flashes gadget and shields eyes*  
  
Bully 1: *no recollection* : Shut up punk! One more word out of you nerd boy and will give you a wedgie so bad you not gonna walk straight for weeks!  
  
Clay: *winks at camera and gives thumbs up sign*  
  
*scene switches to Yamagi walking through Tall People's Convention*  
  
Yamagi: *in swarm of Tall persons* TALL PEOPLE SUCK AND ARE CLOSELY RELATED TO APES! *huge crowd turns*  
  
Tall People: Let's stomp this shorty SENSELESS!!  
  
Yamagi: EEK! NEUROLIZER! *light flashes*  
  
Tall Person: Hey little shorty whatchu doin' here? Let me show you the way to the exit.  
  
*scene switches back to Chaos*  
  
Chaos: The possibilities are endless and now you can get your own neurolizer today for only $999. YES! ONLY $999! Order today!!!!! OR you can get it  
  
Random Dude in Giraffes Suit: *bicycling by* OR you can get it *singing jingle* only at your Toy R' Us Stooooooooooooooooore *rams into wall* OWW! *neurolizer flashes*  
  
Audience: What a coordinated dude in a giraffe suit..  
  
Random Dude: BUY NOW!!!  
  
Chaos: *talking super fast* Remember always wear sunglasses when using neurolizer. Makers of neurolizers not responsible if friends are neurolized to much and turned into brain dead zombies so don't bother suing us cause we warned you!  
  
Huge crowd of neurolizer users: *over peppy* BUY TODAY  
  
Force: I sure did! GAH! *mob of girls chases him down hall* Maybe using it was a mistaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake  
  
End! Well I tried. Least I'm back! I promise next chapter will be mor humorous cause it seems as though that wasn't nearly as amusing. Well toodles until next time. I PROMISE it will not take months! Tis summer. If you don't see a chapter up in a week bombard me with e-mails! Read and REVIEW! I beg of you suggestions and guest stars needed! Peace out!!!!! 


	11. Kizna and?

11. Kizna and …?

Hello, it has been something like two years since I touched this thing. I just wanted to close this story out before I moved onto to writing my Naruto trilogy. So sit back and enjoy the show as Shameless Advertising comes to a close. Hopefully, you will read the start of my Naruto trilogy entitled Lost when you get the chance. My writing style has completely changed, but I will try and keep the flow the same.

Kizna: WHAT! What do you mean you're closing us down!

Azuma: It is no longer safe for the public to view these ridiculous commercials.

Kizna: BUT YOU STARRED IN ONE!

Azuma: I know and it was insanely cool, BUT STILL, GOA can not be held accountable for the mass riots, fighting, hysteria and uncontrolled laughing fits that have been caused by your shameless excuse for advertising.

Kizna: But if the product sales were increasing weren't we doing an excellent job?

Azuma: Not if we lose all our dignity!

Yu: holding up sign that says "OR OUR SILENCE!"

Rio: Or our free samples of soda!

Leena: Or public sympathy for orphans!

Roose: Or our sense of self image!

Hied: Or our natural eye color.

Zero: Or our Macs.

Kizna: Hey just because you buy a Dell doesn't mean you have to give up your Mac!

Zero: But that's kind of EXPENSIVE.

Kizna: sighs Point taken.

Azuma: So as I said we are shutting this operation down.

Kizna: throws down directors hat DARN! And after all that success from my Vanilla Coke campaign to the neurolizer! What am I supposed to do **now**…

Clay: If you don't mind me making a suggestion. pushes glasses up with middle finger

Erts: STOP DOING THAT!

Clay: …Sorry. Anyway Kizna, have you ever considered directing movies?

Kizna: … Movies? Clay I think… you're onto something.

Azuma: Oh no…

Kizna: OH YES!

Zero: Crap. I'm never ever going to get my repairer back to doing regular stuff am I?

Clay: You might as well give up now.

Zero: I feel my dream is being crushed.

Kizna: Oh but Zero, my dream is just beginning. AHAHAHAHAHA!

The end.

I'll leave it up to your imagination what kind of crazy stuff Kizna comes up with.

I hope you all have a wonderful New Years, Hanukah and Kwanzaa and I'm out of here!

Check up on my Naruto fic, if you're into that kind of thing.


End file.
